Denying Self

I've been such a slacker at blogging lately. To be honest, I've been in a funk the past several months. Ever since I moved back from Hawaii a year and a half ago, I just couldn't adjust well at home. However, the Lord came through for me a few weeks ago. I finally hit a point where I said, "Ok God, I can't do this anymore. I can't live my life like this. I'm miserable. Please help me. Please." I felt pretty distant from God during my "funk". I felt like I couldn't really rely on Him because it seemed nothing was changing. The reason why nothing was changing is because I was fighting Him against the change. Its funny as humans, we are like savages to go after what we want. Its sad that people end up doing unethical, immoral things. Like today on the news, I heard how 3 teenagers in Oklahoma, killed a young college kid running along the road because they were bored. WHAT IN THE WORLD!? These boys got to a point that they would kill someone just to fulfill their boredom. ARE YOU KIDDING ME!? Now, that is extreme. However, when we get to that point where we can't take it, instead of turning to the Lord for our need, we end up making things worse. When we come to a point where we "wave the white flag" of surrender, its not "giving up" how the world would perceive it. It is actually doing something. The motto is, "Don't just stand there, do something!" but the Lord says, "Don't just do something, stand there!" Now we must be wise on how we use those statements. I would expect if we saw a person in dire need, we would help them. However in our circumstances, like maybe someone is struggling being single, or financial issues, I wouldn't suggest just grabbing some random person off the street marrying them, or robbing a bank. However, what we do is remain faithful. Like with the single person issue, we wait on upon the Lord for that person we know we could live with or if its the financial issue, its spending less, getting a job, still remaining faithful to the Lord. However, first point of action is, surrender. Saying, "Lord, I can't do this on my own! I NEED YOU!" That is the very first initiation into "standing there". When we say those words, or words along those lines, we are "standing there". However, we have made an action..we surrendered. I really believe that is what Jesus meant when he said in Mark 8: 34-37,
       "If any of you wants to be my follower, you must turn from your selfish, sinful ways, take up your cross, and follow me. If you try to hang on to your life, you will lose it. But if you give up your life for my sake, you will save it. And what do you benefit if you gain the whole world and lose your soul? Is anything worth more than your soul?"

If we really call ourselves Christians, lets walk the talk. Now, we are all imperfect and I'm not saying expending yourself to be perfect (like I was doing and got exhausted..yeah, i know its impossible but that's my point) but realizing that we can't do this life on our own. Its impossible. That is why we must "deny ourselves" deny our ability that we think we can do things on our own, and give it to the Lord. Matthew Henry says it perfectly in his quote,
"If you want to have life-real life, abundant life, eternal life the way it was meant to be lived-deny yourself as you take up your cross and follow Jesus. and when the Cross brings you, as it did our Savior, to your face, you will see standing next to you, standing available to you, standing ready to help you Jesus Himself."
Sounds like a relief to me. Pressures off, if you let it.