Steady my Heart

Have you guys listened to this song called, "Steady my Heart" by Kari Jobe? She is a christian singer but you should definitely look up this song when you get a chance on youtube or whatever. Definitely pay attention to the lyrics. The second verse that says, "I'm not gunna worry. I know that you got me right inside the palm of your hand. Each and every moment, whats good and what gets broken, happens just the way you plan." and then the chorus goes, "Even when it hurts, even when its hard, even when it all just falls apart. I will run to you cuz I know that you are lover of my soul, healer of my scars. You steady my heart." The second verse just hits me. Everytime I listen to this part, even the whole song, it speaks so much truth to me. Seems like lately, things were coming along in my life then..all of a sudden, everything came to a halt! I'm thinking, "Come on, God! Seriously!? I have been waiting so long and now its crumbling?! What did I do now?!" Its not easy to not over-think, to not worry, and to stay calm. Trusting God is not easy! It can be frustrating, shaky, and difficult. However, its all I got. No one, or nothing can give me grace and have me "in the palm of His hands" like the Lord does. When the second verse says, "whats good and what gets broken, happens just the way you plan." I really try to cling to that as truth. God is sovereign and He is in control. I'm not going to lie on here, I have been wrestling with God lately, asking Him, "Ok, God seriously, you are being like every guy in my life, misleading it seems. Give me something here that you haven't forgotten me!" You know when you are watching a baby, or maybe you have a child of your own, and you are making its bottle and its freaking out on you because you set them down and they are crying, thinking you forgot them. You are just making it's bottle. You have not forgotten them! God is doing the same. God's like, "Jessie! Chill out, I'm making the bottle! My plans are in the making..its timing!!" Its hard being patient. Especially how I feel right now, like nothing is happening in my life. I thought I saw some light, but now I'm not so sure what that entails. I thought I had an idea but not sure what to think now. Yes, people are going to hurt you, you might get blamed for things you didn't do, you get misunderstood, but the Lord is going to fight for you! Lately, since things kind of feel like they fell apart for me, I'm thinking, "What did I do?" But the thing is, I confess and apologize for the wrong I know I've done but the rest you have to leave up to God or if it is dealing with another person, you have to leave that up to God and that person. Maybe, like me, you are waiting to hear on a job, or something like that, and it's taking forever! You want this so bad, but we have to trust that God has it! In the chorus of the song "Even when it hurts, EVEN when its hard, EVEN when it all just falls apart, I WILL RUN TO YOU! CUZ I KNOW that you are lover of my soul, healer of my scars." God is the only one that can take care of this. He is the only one that can "heal your scars", heal you from your past hurts and to keep you moving forward. God loves you and He wants His best for you! I don't know why things fall apart but God knows what He is doing and He wants His best for you! Nothing can mess up His plan! The thing is, this is a hurting world, we are all hurting people, we all hurt each other. However, we can choose to join God in forgiveness and kindness. Either way, whatever side you are positioned in, we should forgive and let God take care of the rest. We were probably that person one time before that we were really angry and took it out on a person who wasn't even the root of an issue. I've done that. But if you are a person who got unjustly accused, forgive that person because they are hurting. Jesus calls us to follow Him. Its not an easy road. Its literally denying all our "rights" we think we have as humans and dying to ourselves putting Jesus first and being called to Love. Love is not about fairness. Its about putting others above yourself, keeping no records of wrong, forgiveness, patient. Read 1 cor. 13. Kindness leads to repentance. God is so kind, I am led to my knees to repent by how awesome his grace is. I am a sinner and I need Him. Though, I may not understand God's ways..and I may get frustrated at times, I may question what He's doing and get mad...but at the end of it, I have no right, no reason, for Him to say He does not love me, because He gave up the most precious thing, His Son, to die on our behalf. How many of us would even give up our dog or our playstation, for another? Exactly! God gave up His ONLY SON! God loves you. He is NOT out to get you when things go wrong. He doesn't just hate you. He loves you! And once His best for you! Just trust He will lead you, defend you, help you, guide you! But most of all, trust Him that He loves you!