What a switch!

So, I'm just gunna be straight out, like I usually am...God has been showing me SOOO much of Himself and how he works! I cannot tell you how much I have learned from the time I've been born to High School, to College, to now with my life out in the "real world". I really am understanding a lot more of why we go through what we go through. Well, let me first tell you about our week. Linds and I were able to come home (south bend,IN) for a week! Its amazing because God has just been spoiling me and I am SO undeserving of it...I'll explain more in a bit. We were home for a week and just being able to rest, bake, and catch up with friends! It was such a good break and boost to getting back on tour. I love just fellowshipping with my friends and laughing! Its so good! I see why God encourages us to laugh. Not only is it good ab exercise, but it helps us just let go of life's worries, struggles, and heartaches.Yesterday, we had a show in Powell,OH for a leadership seminar for middle school and high school student councils. It was really good! Nice kids! While I was home, in the beginning, let me tell you, I was not such a happy camper. I don't know why but when I'm run-down, tired, I often just want to be alone. I just want to do my own thing either being home alone, or off doing something on my own. I just want to be with God..ALONE! I was able to that for about an hour this week-home alone. I noticed my attitude, and how attitudes affect a situation. This is where I"m picking up of where I said I'd fill ya in in a second. The thing is, guys, during the month of October, I did not have a good attitude when things got hard. When I get stressed out or frustrated, I just want to be alone. And yes, I agree, we need to have that alone time. Though I'm extroverted, I recharge like and introvert. I really like being alone sometimes..its good for everyone! However, all I did is mostly complain in my head, became judgmental towards others' faults when they messed up (as if I was perfect...paleezzz!)This caused me to be irritated and shut down, I guess. Then God gives me a blessing of coming home, which was awesome. But was I praising God? No! I was still irritated because I wanted to be alone so bad (which i just need to communicate that better) and complaining about going on the road again, to what I think would be Kentucky. Then, we head out from home and Linds does her call-in with Andrew (our boss). Then, to both of our surprise, thinking we would be in Kentucky (bleh!) for Thanksgiving, we are in California!!! WHAT?!? God, are you kidding me?! God knows how much I love the west and how much I love the mountains, beach, palm trees, and how that is one of the things that I love about God's creation..that beauty! So, God blesses me with making the trip out to Cali next week! I can't believe it! From irritation, bad, pouting, half-empty, attitude to jump to the ceiling rejoicing attitude! Why can't I praise God in the tough times too!!? ugh! I hate that about myself, how I always just praise God when things go the way I want them too..or when God gives blessings! Have we ever considered suffering a blessing?! I haven't but boy, is God really teaching me that it is! Then I found out, we are in Flint, MI with Linds's aunt and uncle, that they are taking us to Frankenmouth, MI tomorrow!! ITS THE WORLD"S LARGEST CHRISTMAS STORE..BRONNER"S!! AHHHH!! And those who know me, I LOVE Christmas! So while I pout, complain, being a brat during October with my horrible attitude, God blesses me with coming home to see friends and family, Christmas stores, and Cali! Though we have trips in AZ and NV which is awesome too!! I'm such a brat, you guys! Seriously, I even worry and whine about never finding a husband and not having the right guy in my life! God has his timing!! He knows! And what we go through, times of suffering and times of praise..its worth it! Suffering is what we need, its good! Suffering, I'm learning, is a privelege..its a discipline. Ok, yes, we cringe at those words..suffering, discipline, but God is SOOOO good..he uses those things for good! God NEVER gives us more than we can't handle! He is so faithful in giving us strength even when WE THINK we can't go on! He knows WE CAN because of Him! I just want to encourage all of you, if you are having a tough time, suffering, things just seem unfair, and you wanna give up..DON"T!! change the attitude!! God does not keep you at rock bottom forever. He lets us get there,admit we need help so we can see His strength and grace work in our lives to where He lifts us up again! Its the most AMAZING thing! There's a reason for the season, folks! There is joy in every sorrow....Seek your God!! Seek Him and He will lead you! No doubt! Even when you feel like its dark, nothing there, no signs...SEEK SEEK SEEK!! I LOVE JESUS!!! I LOVE THIS MAN JESUS!!! HE IS MY EVERYTHING AND I am a pitiful servant of Christ who needs to learn to rejoice in her suffering!! Its amazing how the God of the universe can love such a ungrateful brat like me!